A Hero - and a Shameless Plug

Graphic courtesy of True Pizza

Big Tent Poetry is all about food this week, which just happens to be one of my favorite subjects.  I decided to do a shameless plug for myself as well as post a food-related poem, so I am offering, for your epicurean delight, a true hero kind of poem.  Hero.  Get it?

Anyway...

...the following poem, along with other very 'cool beans' poems, (some of which are about food and some of which are are not) can be found in my book Mugging for the Camera.   It's a collection of quirky, oddball, humorous poems, as you probably guessed. And if you buy the book?  You will be my new favorite hero!

(It's available at Virtualbookworm.com, Amazon.com and other fine online bookshops.)

What's for Lunch?

Accents and idioms truly abound

in every state and every town.

One way to for one to manage to see

the spoken word discrepancy

is the local names we give for food.

Example?  A tube-shaped meal can include:

A sub - or the longer form, submarine

where meats and cheeses are often routine-

ly piled quite high between some bread slices,

sometimes with mayo, oil, vinegar and spices.

It can also be called a hoagie or even a grinder

and if you forget, here's another reminder

that some folks say po'boy and others say wedge

with tomato and lettuce sticking out from the edge

of the Italian or Cuban; they both taste soooo good,

along with the sarney or the famous Dagwood.

There's the bomber, the depth charge, the zep and baguette,

and I have a few more 'cause I'm not finished yet!

There's also the speidie from New York, Upstate,

you can savor the flavor - it always tastes great.

Just go to a deli and say that you need, oh...

a hamboat or roast beef foot-long torpedo!

In case you might wonder, this list's incomplete,

but it's made me quite hungry - so I think I'll go eat.

###

Aunty Emma's Bad Blueberry Buckle

This looks really yummy, doesn't it? 
All blueberry-ish and sweet and crumbly.  When it's done right, it's mmm, mmm delish!  However, in the wrong hands...
Which brings me to the reason for this post.  Three Word Wednesday gave these three words as today's prompts:

Buckle, Evade, Wedge

Evasive maneuvers?  A chasm or wedge in a relationship?  All good starting points, eh?  But what to do with the buckle?  Belt?  Shoe?  Fashion statement?  Hmmmmmmm...

And that's when I realized this all could be about food.  (Of course.) 

Here's my unhealthy take on the prompt:

Aunty Emma’s Blueberry Buckle

Aunty Emma’s Blueberry Buckle

is the most horrible one in the universe.

Just one small wedge and we all cry,

“Please!  Get a doctor or a nurse!

(Or hearse!”)

I can’t guess what she puts in it

since cobblers, buckles and pies

are simple enough to make and so,

there’s usually no surprise.

(Not wise.)

Regarding Aunty Emma’s stuff:

Is it the berries or the dough?

Or is there something else in it?

Ooooh - ominous, I know.

Although…

there is one point and it's perfectly clear:

this food can’t be enjoyed.

So here’s the warning I must share,

“Evade!  Escape!  Avoid!"    

Factoid:

This pastry will make you sick as a dog,

and this I promise you.

Ergo, do not eat Aunty Emma’s

berry buckle blue.

###

(And just for the record, I don't have an Aunty Emma.  I just make stuff up, sometimes.)

Et Voilà!

Sunday Scribblings prompt was 'manifesto' - Delicioso!

Pesto Manifesto

First, you take some nuts of pine.

Second, you must then combine

garlic (minced) and basil, please.

Add some Parmesano cheese.

Splash a dash of lemon juice.

Finally, you introduce

olive oil (extra-virgin.)

Get the best: it’s worth the splurgin’.

Mix ingredients.  Say, “Presto!”

Et voilà, you just made pesto.